Tuesday, November 24, 2009

it's good to see you, i missed you last night.

i don't have a home. i don't feel comfortable or at ease anywhere. i lied, when i'm with my mom and ali i feel at home. i hope we get that place in laguna.
i feel like shit i feel like shit i feel like shit.
brian blew my phone up last night, with death wishes. for himself. "he probably cried himself to sleep". sad, but probably true. it's amazing that someone can feel that bad. he goes so dark.
i don't feel good. i'm unsettled. my whole situation is unsettling.
i'm exhausted but i can't fall asleep. i don't want to fall asleep. i wish i had someone to comfort me. i want to be comforted all the time by others. i need to satisfy myself. only after taking care of myself can i even fathom taking care of another.
jake. he's always there for me. unconditionally. i could learn a thing or two from him.

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